Man on train - "Can you please stop tapping your foot?"
Me - "I'd really like to, but it's physically impossible."

Some faucets don't have "hot" nor "cold" marked on them, yet we still know which way to turn the knob to get what we want.

I don't need to comment on everything said to me.

People get so angry at the CTA when it is running behind. And I know why. It's because getting angry makes the trains run faster.

? "I [have] received life like a wound, and I have forbidden suicide to heal the scar. I want the Creator - every hour of his eternity - to contemplate i

? ts gaping crevasse. This is the punishment I inflict upon him."
- Comte de Lautreamont

I hope I die before I get to the point of having to do a series of Lamas type breathing exercises just to pee.